Saturday, 12 January 2013

You can't please all of the people all of the time

I’m a tantric masseur. My mission is to make people feel good.  I’m good at what I do and I enjoy it. I love it when someone arrives tense and nervous, but leaves relaxed and happy, almost a completely different person. However, every now and then I will come across a client, who confounds all my attempts to get through to him, and he remains as locked in and closed off to himself as when he arrived. It doesn’t happen very often, but when it does, I find myself momentarily questioning my abilities and wondering if I did something wrong.

A few days ago I received a call from a new client. He evidently had little experience of tantric massage, so I explained to him that it was a sexual, sensual massage. Was this what he was looking for? Yes. I asked him which of the two massages I offered he wanted (with or without digital internal prostate). Unhesitating, he opted for the prostate massage, so I booked him in for later that evening and said I would look forward to seeing him later. When he arrived, he was extremely tense, uptight and nervous, so, as I usually do, I asked him to sit down while I gave him a brief description of how the massage would progress. I explained in detail about the digital prostate massage and asked him if he was sure that was what he wanted. He was sure.

Before my client gets on the table, I usually start with a short ritual, assuming of course if they are ok with it. This ritual consists of some deep breathing, mutual touch while still clothed and then slowly undressing each other. During the mutual touching phase, I put my arms round my client and hug him. It is at this point I can usually tell how the massage will go. Most men give themselves up to the hug, hug me back and we remain locked in embrace for a few moments, breathing in sync. It is a moment I particularly enjoy. This client remained rigid. He half-heartedly put his arms around me, but I could tell he wasn’t giving in to the experience so I swiftly moved to get him onto the table. I started to massage his back, but every time I went anywhere near his buttocks he tensed up and clenched them. I quickly abandoned any idea of internal prostate, and decided to just massage the perineum area. However, having already spent a substantial amount of time on his legs, as I slid my finger between his inner thighs, he screamed out as if in pain, enjoining me to stop. Believe me I wasn’t even anywhere near the opening of his anus. I decided to go back to basic massage.

Eventually I asked him to turn over. Judging by the tumescent state of his penis, something was turning him on, but it was as if he refused to acknowledge it. When I massage a person’s arms, I usually hold their hand and lower arm up against me, whilst I massage the upper arm and shoulder. When I tried this with him, he pulled his arm away from me, the very opposite of relaxed submission. I decided the only thing to do was to give him a basic massage for the remaining time and then leave it at that. As I moved on to his chest though, his penis started to swell and grow. I moved down to his stomach, occasionally brushing his penis with my hand and it got even harder. OK, so maybe he would give in to some penis massage. As I took it in my hand, gently massaging its length, he took hold of my penis and started furiously wanking it. I quickened my strokes on his and it wasn’t long before he exploded all over his chest and stomach. Usually at this point, I clean up the client, have him lie there a little longer, while I gently caress his body, do a little head massage and generally relax them. Often at this point, they fall asleep. On this occasion this was not a possibility. He sat up immediately, asked if he could have a shower and disappeared into the bathroom. He was gone quite a while, so maybe he was trying to wash away his sin. I really don’t know.

When he came back from the bathroom, I tried to engage him in conversation in an attempt to discover what had gone wrong, even offering to reduce the fee, as he hadn’t really got what he paid for. He refused and grunted that everything was fine and that he was quite happy. After he left I felt awful, as if I had somehow let him down.

Fortunately the next day redressed the balance. My first client of the day was also very nervous, and admitted to it when he arrived.  How different from the previous day, though. The moment he gave himself up to the hug, I knew we would be ok, and indeed he told me, after the massage, that he was completely taken by surprise by his own reaction, and how he’d felt at one point that he was almost lifting off the table, so intense was his pleasure. I remarked on the fact that he had made my job easier by totally giving in to the experience, and he told me that this too had surprised him, as he was normally such a reserved person. Clearly I had got through to him in a way that was impossible with the other man. He was so closed off to himself and anyone around him, that there was nothing I could do. For all that, I did feel bad that he had not received the service of which I am capable, and felt that I had let him down, so I’d like to say thank you to the second of these two men for restoring my belief in myself.

I should have remembered something my father used to say to me.  “Son,” he would say, “you can’t please all of the people all of the time.” It’s definitely something worth remembering.

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